One week down, eleven to go...

One week down, eleven to go…

Finally I have completed my diploma in connoisseurship! After a fourteen hour love in with my laptop yesterday my crushing expose of the quantity of semen in architectural theory has been received in triplicate by the office. Now all that remains is to wait for the judgement by the official proprietors of culture.

Meanwhile we’ve had a visit from Nigel, our pompous little landlord. A typical example of Naz’s friends, he thinks he’s wild because when he went to Lanark Academy he convinced the social anthropology department to let him do his dissertation on poker players-“You see the thing is, most people make the mistake of playing poker for fun…and backgammon too, I don’t understand why other people don’t sit down and work out all the probabilities, I mean why doesn’t everyone else take the time to consider the benefits of playing a more defensive game?” Then he begins his Lord bountiful monologue about how much I must be enjoying the pad, “I mean double glazing is just such a joy isn’t it…” I’m tempted to interrupt and enquire how he’s enjoying having his mortgage paid by my student loan but Naz’s forbidding expression stops me in my tracks.

On the brighter side, Gertrude is looking radiant, Sexy and Helliot have split up again, possibly for good this time, and I have three hundred hours of American teen drama to wade through.

Olga Whim signing off.